What do you dislike the most about Indian society?
Fauzan Fahad, studies at Patliputra University Patna (2023)
I was standing at a small kirana shop on the Delhi University campus when a young man in his 20s stopped by for cigarettes. The shopkeeper advised him to give up smoking. Good advice, no doubt. If only he had stopped there. But of course, he had to ruin it by telling the guy that if he had been getting married his potential wife would have made him quit, but alas, women nowadays are smokers themselves.
A few days later in the same vicinity, a college student came to a paan shop looking for rolling paper. A Delhi uncle couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that being a girl, she was doing "such things." The girl walked away but the rest of us were subjected to a tirade on society's dismal condition.
Being stared at
This is something any Indian woman will tell you without a second thought. Stepping out on the streets is like being on display at a zoo — there is just no stopping the stares, the lecherous looks. One thing you have to give them is that they don't discriminate — whether you're in a burqa or shorts, Indian or foreigner, you will receive the same unnerving stare.
Stereotypes set in stone
"Immoral" and "promiscuous" are just two of the words women who are modern, drink, smoke, party, and hang out with boys are used to hearing themselves described as. There is this constant message that the gatekeepers of society's morals send out — good girls are traditional, docile, and domestic and to be anything else is shameful.
The way indian men stare when they see a female buying cigarettes. Leave off guy, I can do what I please.
There is a general understanding in Indian society that if a woman gets raped, assaulted, or harassed, it is because she in some way asked for it It could be her behaviour, her attitude, her actions, or her clothes that made her "deserve" it. In all the different cases of brutality, the common thread is that the woman somehow invited the trouble that befell her. But how exactly is it that even infants bring these horrific situations upon themselves?
Rutuja Kanade, worked at Paytm Mall
Lets start with a true story. Story is about my friend.
So my friend was in relationship with a girl for almost 2 years. They were classmates for 2 years and afterwards they got into relationship.
He was in 2nd Year of MBA (IIM) ,when he went to her home with marriage proposal. We all thought what a lucky guy . Personally, I thought what a love story, two college friends, then lovers , plus same religion ,same caste.. this is what we call Destiny.
yes these three words crush your dreams.
Her uncle rejected the proposal.
Because subcaste were not same. And let me tell you, nor her dad and not even her uncle knew what IIM means? They clearly said 'you are studying, you dont even have a job yet ‘ . He literally had to convince them that he will definately get a job as he is a IIM student.
This friend of mine has seen so much in his life .. from economical problem to relatives fighting over a piece of land. We all consider him as a self made man because he has faced so much in life.But what her uncle said is 'you don’t even have a big home . Your home can’t even occupy five guests' . Obviously all these were the reasons to reject . But the main reason was subcaste(as told by him).
译文来源：三泰虎 http://www.santaihu.com/48698.html 译者：Joyceliu
Present scenario -
He has a job. (Obviously with good salary). Build a 4bhk bungalow at his home town.His younger brother got married.
That girl is not getting married to anybody. Her younger sister got married last Year.
My friend also declared that he will not marry. But because of his parents health problem, he ultimately said yes to marry a girl which they will choose.
So here the four lives, which eventually going to be ruined.
My friend and the girl are not ready to move on.And parents are not ready to listen.
Arundhati V. Bhide, Research Assistant
Indians give too much thought to what people and society will think of them. We constantly worry what our elders will think and only spend our lives doing blatantly stupid formalities to please everyone.
We fall like dogs at the feet of people who are older…women care too much about what their mother-in-law thinks about them…and sons are under too much pressure to earn more than their wives.
Why should we? Should we touch somebody's feet only because they were born before us? This does not guarantee mental or spiritual maturity.
Why can't Indian men digest that their girlfriend has a better paying job?
Sexist attitudes even in the richest, most educated of families and the undying need for approval from society has engulfed the Indian mindset.
There is NOTHING WRONG with being wiser than somebody older who probably did very wrong things in their lifetime.
There is NOTHING WRONG with walking out of a marriage. Happiness is important and life is short.
There is NOTHING WRONG when a successful woman chooses to be with someone who is still finding his way up the corporate ladder.
One more horrible thing about Indian society is that LOVE is awkward. It's unnatural. It's strange to tell family elders that you have feelings for someone. Come on! That's humanly stuff and you aren't human! Right?
Many families have changed. Many men and women have changed. I'm only speaking for the majority.
To top all this, most Bollywood films are intense love stories and the same family elders watch them with awe with their children.
While Indians have so many gems in their culture and personality. This one block, if cleared will help change the overall aura of the country and ENCOURAGE CREATIVITY.
Aritri Das, B.tech Computer Science and Engineering, National Institute of Technology, Agartala (2020)
I will describe the situations with example and then you find yourself, isn’t it annoying!
Indians are more concerned about the family matters of others. They can never find any problem at their own home.
Aunty 1: Do you know one boy came to drop Sharma Ji’s daughter.
Auntry 2: Really! The boy must be her boyfriend. Does Sharma Ji know about it?
Aunty 1: I don’t think so, it’s our responsibility to tell him.
Like seriously, why the hell should they interfere? Who said it’s their responsibility?
Hypocrisy: They have two faces. One in front of you where no one can be better than them and the other where they will be back stabbing you.
Infront of you
Person: You are such a nice person and speak the truth on the face. You don’t hesitate before speaking. It’s a good thing. You should be clean from your heart.
At your back:
Same Person: This girl is so Mufat (outspoken) (who never thinks before saying anything)-can’t recall the exact english word. Who will marry her! She is having an ill character.
Shabarinath Nair, Indian || Student Architect || Linguist || History Buff
Nosey Indian Relatives
I experienced this situation for the first time in my life when my 10th results came out.
All of a sudden every single person on earth was suddenly interested in my life. My parents even got calls from relatives whom I've never ever seen in my life. All they wanted to know was, “How did your son do in the exams? Did he get A1 in all the subjects??”. To be very honest, all of them seemed disappointed when my parents said Yes. My parents had never enquired what happened to their own kids when their results came out, yet they felt it was very necessary to be over concerned about me. And the same thing happened again in the next few years. I mean if they were actually concerned, they would've at least called me before the exams wishing me luck and giving me their blessings.
So what was the actual purpose of the enquiry? To know whether their kid did better than me? To have a feeling of evil self-satisfaction?
And I'm pretty sure this would follow in the coming years, whether I graduated with flying colours? Whether I got a job? How much is the salary package? Did I get married? Did I have kids?…Et cetera
It's high time these type of relatives learn what the concept of privacy means